sohotrightnow: ([etc] al ha-t'vila)
My annual review was at 3 PM Thursday. I'd been telling myself for a few days now that I shouldn't be so anxious about it because if I were (as anxiety tends to tell one is the case) doing every single thing wrong and bringing the company down in flames around me, they would not just wait for months to tell me so. Hell, my boss's biggest criticism last year was that she thought that I'd been too harsh in my self-evaluation.

Then I realized that actually, even if it all did go as badly as my anxiety was trying to convince me it would, it still wouldn't be the thing I was dreading most about the week, or even the following 24 hours.

As it happened, it went pretty well! My boss agreed with my own self-assessment, no nasty surprises whatsoever, except that again she thought I hadn't really given myself enough credit for some things.

I also got a call on Thursday morning from my Representative's local office letting me know that he wouldn't be attending the Inauguration. I had called about it a few days prior, encouraging him to join the other Reps who weren't going, and forgot to leave my number in the message, but at this point they're on a first-name basis with me there, so were able to find my number in their records and call me to let me know, which was cool.

Friday was...Friday. My Torah study group arranged a virtual minyan to say the Kaddish together at noon, which was surprisingly therapeutic. I stayed off Twitter for most of the day, but was delighted to come back to video of some hero punching a Nazi downtown, not to mention the Internet's many glorious variations on it. (I am okay with having a Nazi exception in my non-violence principles and am comfortable with the fact that this might make me a hypocrite. If you're troubled by this, fine, but please just defriend or scroll past rather than arguing with me about it in the comments.)

Saturday, Mom and I went to the march downtown! It was exhausting and I still hate crowds but this one was worth it. We were actually able to see the stage, distantly! Then we stopped off for late lunch/early dinner on the way home and had some wine, and went home and crashed. Some notes:
  • Many of the speakers were fantastic -- Ashley Judd was lovely, Tammy Duckworth was awesome, and I SAW ANGELA FUCKING DAVIS, AHHHH -- but Sophie Cruz was the only one that made me weep.

  • At one point on the Metro ride in everyone started singing "This Land is Your Land".

  • We had to make a path through the crowd during one of the speeches because a police officer was helping a woman who had gone into labor through to the nearest EMT, and a woman near us said "Officer, I'm a pediatrician, do you want me to come with you?" The officer, surprised and delighted, said "Sure!" It was just a surprising, wonderful little detail that would seem too perfect to have happened if I hadn't actually seen it.

  • Another woman nearby had the most adorable baby who was incredibly easy-going? Like, she slept through most of the speeches, woke up a little before Mom and I left, and was in a great mood.

  • We'd been trying to make it downtown in time for the Wonkette meetup. We did not manage this, but at one point Rebecca (the owner/EIC) and her family went right past us and I said hi, which she informed me counts as having succeeded anyway.
Sunday was quiet, recuperating and having dinner with my sister in celebration of her birthday. Pizza and cake and ice cream and family, yay!

Today, as it has been for most of the past few days, it's gloomy and rainy, but there's a lot more wind, which is an exciting way of mixing it up.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([etc] get excited and make things)
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([bsg] only thing mine)
I've basically had to severely limit my Twitter activities because all of the shit on the past few days in Congress and in Virginia (which, for those playing along at home, is where I live, grew up, and will be living for the foreseeable future) has been threatening to trigger me, so that's. A thing. Like, to the point where I've been thinking about removing a couple of pretty close friends because they will. not. stop. posting about it, and have said things that it's hard not to hear as implying that if I am bothered by the unceasing and frequently graphic descriptions of transvaginal ultrasounds (that my home is now mandating for any woman who wants to have an abortion, as well as essentially rendering the Pill, IUDs, and emergency contraception illegal) then clearly I don't ~care~, and honestly I cannot deal with a lot of details about state-mandated rape. I actually cannot. Go figure.

So that's something that's happening here in my state. Please, please donate to Planned Parenthood, and if you're in VA make your voice heard, for the love of God, and do that if you're anywhere else as well, for Congress in general, and most of all, please, please do not attempt to engage me further on this, because I am at the end of my rope.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([tv] hey girl hey)
PERRY DROPPED OUT???? oh man, he was the only one I had any concern about as a viable candidate besides Romney, so yessssssssssss. It's like the power of Bruce Springsteen did it. Man didn't Warren Ellis's review of the ESB at Glastonbury describe Springsteen as a god of rock & roll? Maybe the power of his liberal rage really did do it. I choose to believe that.

...I think I need another margarita. What, I got up at one AM, for me, 12:30 in the afternoon is like 6:30 in the evening for normal people.

Also: my father received a packet from the Republicans asking him to be an elector for this congressional district. TEMPTATION TO COMMIT ELECTORAL FRAUD: MASSIVE. "How do you rate the actions of the Republican-controlled House of Representatives?" DISAPPROVE; NEEDS MOAR SOCIALISM. Do I support amnesty for undocumented aliens? WELL IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH FOR REAGAN, AS A TRUFAX REPUBLICAN IT WOULD BE A BIT HYPOCRITICAL FOR ME TO DISAPPROVE OF SOMETHING ST. REAGAN DID, WOULDN'T IT? Sry2say, it's not so much my conscience stopping me, it's the fact that $15 contribution is required for "processing" to commit to it, even before the additional donations they request.

LOLOLOL oh god, they think that the Obama administration is "radical", you guys, oh my god. As someone whose main frustration with Obama isn't actually with him, but with the fact that I live in a society where HE'S the liberal candidate, I have to lol because otherwise I will cry. :(
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([atla] an unwanted stranger)
You know, I've seen a few different people saying that everyone needs to watch Olbermann's Special Comment in response to the shooting, no matter what our politics or opinions on Olbermann are.

Fun fact: in response to the way he potentially triggery )

Sooooo I'll be off my flist for a few days, by which time I assume it'll have run its linking course and I can be reasonably certain I won't run into the line of "you need to watch this" again. Because yeah, I agree 100% with what he's saying, or what I heard him saying before I had to admit that I wasn't going to be able to make it through this and closed the tab, but I actually cannot listen to Olbermann talk at this point. So please, please, please stop telling me that I have to, that my feelings on someone who has done more than his fair share to minimize and belittle rape and endanger women involved in a rape case don't matter because he said something important.

(I'm bipartisan in my distaste for dickish and dangerous rhetoric and will agree that we need to make fucking well sure the Tea Party's cheerful calling for Giffords's targeting, among others, for gun violence isn't forgotten. But yeah, other people have said that better than I.)

Comments on, but screened. And I promise, I'm pretty okay, I'm just trying to make sure I stay that way.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([gg] in your arms I come alive)
FUCK YES, DADT. I have a whole hypothesis where this is going to be not only a big step on the road to marriage equality, but quite probably a direct cause of it. I'll spare you dudes the entire thing, but suffice it to say my money's on ten years at the absolute outside.

Less significant things that happened yesterday: the roommate and I saw The Tempest (which is playing at only one theater in the area so far)! It was really excellent and really dark and upsetting and very very clearly about how you can never really win against the kyriarchy, and while it was every bit as grim and depressing as that makes it sound, it was also very cathartic, too. Gorgeous-looking (weird music-video bits with Aeriel notwithstanding) and, of course, fantastic acting from all concerned.

I was sort of planning to go to Nellie's today, because they show all the football games and we're playing Dallas (I am not particularly invested DC's team -- I really hate the name and generally don't use it -- or Baltimore's, but I hate the Cowboys with every fiber of my being) and Sundays they have Drag Brunches, $20 for all you can eat (and first mimosa's free!) and if it's anything like Drag Bingo it will be amazing. Mostly today I am feeling kind of lazy and antisocial and crampy (ugh IDEK what the deal was, for some reason my PMS wasn't that much fiercer than usual, but it was spread out a lot longer so it seemed much worse, and it was such a freaking relief yesterday when my period finally fucking started) and not really wanting to leave the apartment anymore after my Big Epic Quest across the street for a hot water bottle and a bagel. Plus it was looking like I'd be the only one going, and these things are always more fun with other people.

But then I remembered that not only is it a DC sports bar when we're playing Dallas, but it's a gay DC sports bar and not only are we playing Dallas, but, at least as relevant to the patrons of a gay sports bar in DC, DADT is in its death throes as of yesterday (seriously, don't underestimate how much we hate the Cowboys). That might be just the pick-me-up I've been needing. Off I go, will report back later.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([celeb] be a doper space hero)
Here is the deal: the United States is a big country. Not only that, but its regions are pretty big beyond that. And you know what? There are assholes all over that country, and at all levels of society.

So, yeah, I found it really heartening that this facebook group, set up by students at Constance McMillen's school for the purpose of mocking her, was mostly filled with posts from outsiders defending Constance. I found it a lot less heartening to see how many of those comments were calling the people there dumb hicks, saying that they'd be sorry when she was successful and they were living in trailers, etc. I've seen some stuff on LJ, even, talking about how awful and backwards the South is, and especially how awful and backwards poor people in the South are.1

And yes, okay. There is a lot of bigotry in the South. But as someone who grew up right smack between the South and the North (Virginia is geographically Southern, but honestly if I tried to call myself a Southerner I suspect real Southerners would laugh at me, my slight accent and use of "bless your heart" notwithstanding), trust me, guys, there's a lot of bigotry outside of it, too. Shall we talk about how Pennsylvania bans same-sex marriages, and Michigan? How they were defeated in New York? How California overturned its own legalization of them? Shall I tell you about my efforts to start a GSA in high school were stonewalled, and we were finally told we could start the club, but we couldn't advertise it with posters or hold/advertise events or get time in the announcements like other clubs could?

We could have a whole conversation about how the culture of oppression is different in the North than in the South, if we want to (I don't really want to right now, so I'd rather not have it here, but you get what I'm saying), because the culture of pretty much anything you name is going to be different in the North than in the South.2 But as someone who grew up in Virginia -- as someone whose mother grew up in a trailer -- do not try and fucking characterize this as only being about the South, or poor people in the South.3 Bigotry is a problem at all corners of society and in every state in the Union, but there are also people fighting it in every state and all corners of society. That's the whole problem, here; that's why I'm getting all tu quoque-y in this post: it's not as simple a matter as everyone below the Mason-Dixon Line hates queers and everyone above it doesn't, or everyone below a certain income bracket hates queers and everyone above it doesn't, or everyone of one race or religion hates queers and everyone of another doesn't. I seem to recall we had a similar discussion when Prop 8 passed and there were fingers pointed at black voters, or Latino voters, or older voters, and the same conclusion was reached: it's not as simple as just one group of people being responsible for all anti-queer sentiment and resulting legislation, and pretending it is that simple doesn't do anyone any favors. So how about we not?

(And don't get me started on the fun misogyny in the Facebook posts, where people were attacking the girls who went to their secret prom for looking like "skanks". Also, I really don't have any icons appropriate to this post. I guess Kanye shooting a laser gun is a good expression of my rage.)

1. Or, from non-Americans watching this develop, how awful and backwards the United States is, and IDEK how to verbalize my feelings there beyond "fuck you" because goodness knows I've complained about things here enough, but -- it's like how I'm allowed to make fun of my family/friends but no one else is, you know?

2. But first, protip: "the South" is a fucking huge region, and the culture of a city in North Carolina is going to be very different from that of a small town in Arkansas.

3. BTW, "white trash" is a really fucking racist phrase to use to describe poor white people, as it assumes that the default for "trash" is not white, so how about we not use it, period, in this debate or any other.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([atla] needs moar gay)
Oh, man, but one of the things that is emphatically NOT making me cranky today: gay marriage went into effect in DC and here are some photos. With a couple of protesters and the fucking WBC, but whatever, mostly they are wonderful pictures of gay couples at the courthouse.

The realization that I have found a shul that wholly supports gay marriage, which is located in a city that, as of today, recognizes the validity of gay marriage, is kind of making me a lot more emotional than I expected it to do. If I end up with someone -- whether they're a dude or a lady -- who I decide I want to marry, I will be able to do that. Yep.
sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([bandom] down in a dead man's town)
Hey, Sarah Palin, those "death panels" you're saying they have in the UK? We've already got them. They're called insurance companies.

TL;DR on why I have a lot of trouble being rational in health care discussions. )

IDK. I have a lot of trouble talking coherently about health care, and even now I'm having to stop and get up and walk away from this entry sometimes because I'm about to start crying. It's one of my kneejerk issues, the things that I have a really hard time being rational about, or at least not being emotional about. It fills me with such sadness and terror.

sohotrightnow: the top of a swimming young woman's torso. ([bandom] down in a dead man's town)
Now that one of them has been murdered, Jill Stanek has posted the photographs and addresses of the only two remaining providers of late-term abortion.

I don't care what your personal feelings on abortion are. If you believe
  • that this is acceptable (let alone noble)
  • that there is any word for this -- the murder of Dr. Tiller and the tactics used to intimidate, hurt, and kill anyone who believes that a woman should not be forced to carry a pregnancy to term -- besides "terrorism"
  • that the cold-blooded murder of a man at church is somehow demonstrative of a respect for the sanctity of human life
  • if you agree with Dr. Tiller's murderer that the right to life might begin at conception, but it apparently ends at birth
please feel free to defriend me now.

Comments off because this is not up for debate.

(Man, you guys think I get worked up about this, wait 'till you hear me complain about people who talk about the ~great injustice~ done to Adam Lambert and don't say word one about the Dan Choi case.)

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